So, ive been thinking a lot about being a Godlly woman. About beauty (we all know people who we look at and say wow that is a beautiful person, with a beautiful spirit) and about being wanted. What is being a godlly woman? Whats the point of being beautiful if outward apperiances dont matter? Who do i go to when no one wants me? I think a lot of girls struggle with those questions.... So me being my etremelly stubborn self, decided that i could handle it by myself. Im selfish and wanted the glory and praise of dealing with my doubt and problems on my own. And i was to embarased to go to God AGAIN and say "ok.. i need your help. Look at what ive done." Pathetic huh?! YES!! I forget all the time that God does not point fingers, or judge. Part of being a beautiful and godlly woman is being able to be vulnerable. Coming out and loving myself and saying "this is how i am. This is how God made me, and this is how he loves me. Flaws and all." I think that is a huge step to being a godlly woman. Acceptng and loving who you are. Not being pridefull, but proud to have a feminen body and posses the grace and serenity that comes with being a woman. And also being able to be humble and acknowledge when you mess up and need help from God, or other people. So as far as beauty goes, when i think about women, or girls that i know that i think are beautiful, and lovelly, they are girls that are inlove with God and show passion, and forgivness, and grace, and its completelly effortless because they allow the beauty of God to flow through them instead of trying to make their own. They look to God for aproval instead of other people, or things. When they look to God for their assurance they get to see the way God see's them, as his precious daughter. Psalms 45:11 says "The king is enthralled with your beauty" Enthralled... with me?.. Enthralled means: filled with wonder and delight, to hold spellbound, captivating. UHMMMM WHAT!??! God looks at ME and is filled with wonder and delight? He is held spellbound? I captivate Him? God? wow.... Ok.. Im just going to leave that there and go to the next question. ;) Why am i not wanted? And who do i go to when im not? Everyone wants to be wanted. And when i thought about this im thinking like when a boy loves and wants a girl. A man loves a woman. Why would God put such a strong yearning to be wanted, held, and loved in someone, in me if he wasnt going to fill my disires? But He is more than willing to fill my desires. Only HE can tho. Not a boy. God. God wants me to fall inlove with him before i fall inlove with anyone else. He calls my his bride. He wants to know me and be known like how a Bridegroom wants to know and pursue his bride. There is absolutlly no boy that can ever completelly satisfy my desires to be wanted and loved. Only God can. He teaches us how to love and be loved through our relationship with Him so that we can love, and know how to be loved by the man that he has for us. wow....
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